Things a mum of boys will understand

As a mum of boys, I have accepted that certain things will happen in my house that I do not understand.

Things that probably never crossed my radar earlier.

I have a brother, so I was exposed to some of these things growing up, but my two boys have well and truly opened my eyes to them.

My husband is one of four boys, so he is already across all these things. He knows what to expect and isn’t really surprised when I tell him the stuff our boys have done.

If you’re a mum of boys, I’m sure you will totally be able to relate to these.

  • Transformers. 

It’s not just its ability to change from vehicle to robot, but that you HAVE to make the noise that goes along with it when you transform it. I know you’re now making this noise in your head… My eldest went through a phase when we had to play Transformers all the time. The trolley (i.e. me) had to make Transformer noises when we were doing the food shopping, he had to make the noise before he went in the bath. Basically whenever you went to do a different action or task, the noise had to accompany it.

transformer

  • Farts.

Apparently they are hilarious. I just don’t get it. When one of our boys farts, the other laughs like it is the funniest thing they have ever heard. Our six year old has actually laughed so hard after his brother has farted, he fell off the chair. Now our toddler laughs at himself when he farts.

  • The smell.

Their bedrooms smell like dirty socks, pretty much every day. I air out the boys’ rooms every day along with emptying their laundry hampers, so I’m still baffled as to why the rooms get whiffy. God know how bad they’re going to smell when they’re teenagers…

  • Minecraft.

What is with that?! Our six year old can talk about it for ages. Non-stop. The other day he talked about Minecraft for almost 40 minutes straight. But when I ask him about his day at school, I get a one sentence answer (if I’m lucky), and that’s it.

image credit
image credit
  • Identifying dinosaurs correctly.

Bonus points if you can translate their name too. Now I was a total dinosaur nerd when I was a kid. Seriously. When I was seven, I told my parents I wanted to be a palaeontologist when I grew up. So I get this one, kind of. Although I don’t recall asking about who would win in a battle of T-Rex vs Allosaurus, or who was more vicious. Or did any of the dinosaurs have poisonous spit… But when I can answer my six year old’s question of “what does ‘velociraptor’ mean”, and tell him “speedy thief”, he is impressed. I’m “cool Mum”.

Image credit: amazon.com
Image credit
  • Dolls.

Do not, under any circumstances, joke about giving them a Barbie for their birthday. I didn’t think it was that big a deal. Boys can play with dolls, just as girls can play with cars. Based on our son’s reaction though, I was wrong. It is not cool. It will not be well-received. There will be tears.

  • Wrestling.

My husband was away a lot for work when our eldest was little so I did a lot of the typical dad-son stuff with him so he didn’t miss out. Like wrestling. Until I ended up with a little finger hooked in my nose that was so shockingly painful, it brought tears to my eyes. Wrestling was put on hold after that.

wrestling
image credit
  • Pee on the bathroom floor.

For crying out loud, I have lost count of how many times this has happened and I’ve had to clean the floor AGAIN. How hard is it?! We have now painted a Lego man silhouette on the downstairs toilet door. It acts as a sign that this is a toilet used by boys. It tells our guests “there is a good chance there will be pee on the floor, so watch where you step”.

Do you have boys? What other things do you think mums of boys would understand?

Make sure you’re following Life, kids and a glass of red on Facebook for extra giggles and snippets of silliness.

Linking up with Essentially Jess for #IBOT

 

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47 thoughts on “Things a mum of boys will understand

  1. What a good post. I really enjoyed reading it and I laughed quite a few times. I don’t have any children myself yet, but I have friends with boys and I can see them in what you write!

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  2. Haha, I love the lego sign, what a great idea! My boy is 8 months old now so not at the pee on the floor point yet. And my three year old daughter thinks poo jokes are hilarious, so I guess I’m doomed to a son and a tomboy! Maybe my boy will want to do ballet and paint his nails… who knows!

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  3. We are a little behind on these at the moment, but I can certainly see all these happening when my toddler is a bit older.

    I completely agree with you about the Fart thing and males. What is with that? My husband and son crack up hilariously with anything farts. But if I happen to lady fart, well, then I am the most disgusting thing in the world aren’t I. Apparently the funny fart stuff doesn’t apply to me.

    xo

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  4. What it is with the terrible aim? I have tried for YEARS to get my boy to clean up after himself and he denies it is him that wets the floor. I say, “well, it can’t have been your sisters or your mothers, so are you suggesting it’s your dad who is weeing all over the floor?” and he says, “yes”. x

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  5. My oldest son is turning 6 this week. I keep hearing about Minecraft from other mums, is this something I should introduce to him, or should I wait for it to make its own entrance? When my twins are toilet trained, I will no doubt have the pee on the floor issue all the time!

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  6. It is the wrestling that drives me crazy. They including the eldest a 12 yo girl turn my bed into a wrestling pit and play tag team wrestlemania. I do not get it. I’d rather cuddle! Mel xx

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  7. Oh, I LOLd at the Barbie one because the one I like to gee my 5 year up about is Elsa from Frozen. “Sorry kid, I couldn’t get you a Spiderman juice, they only had Elsa from Frozen. JUST KIDDING!! I got you The Avengers”

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  8. Pee!

    Two nights ago, the almost four-year-old sleptwalk into the bathroom and neglected to lift the lid before releasing. Seventy-five clorox wipes later…

    This morning, I walk into the bathroom to help with the brushing of teeth. Dried pee all over the bathtub. How’d that happen? Dunno! 12-year-old and almost 4-year-old have absolutely NO IDEA!

    Ugh.

    Minecraft!

    Sometimes, I hand my phone to the one who wants to talk minecraft for 45 minutes and ask him to record all of his thoughts on it for me. Then I can skim for highlights.

    Wrestling!

    At my house, we call this “gameface.” When it begins, my son’s been known to say, “Mom. You do NOT want to see this.”

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  9. This is hilarious! I don’t have boys but I’ve encountered many in my teaching days. I knew the pee on the floor would be in there somewhere, boys’ bathrooms have quite an “aroma,” don’t they?!

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    1. Thanks Sammie! I used to work in boys boarding schools and I’m not sure what smell is worse – sweaty sports socks or that over powering body spray they drench themselves in. Granted it was from 100 teenagers, hopefully my two boys won’t pong that much!

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  10. Thanks for the heads up. I too have two boys and had no brothers so I’m baffled with some of the antics they think is hilarious. Although they are younger 3 and 1, I’m already experiencing some of the things you have pointed out.

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  11. Oh lord, this actually made me excited for my little boy to grow up. It sounds like fun!!! (except for all the penis stuff. Not looking forward to dealing with that. Thank god for Daddy.)

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  12. Oh yes you are so right! Especially on the mine craft! Although the other day my son talked in great detail about his game of gang up at school for ten minutes. That’s a huge improvement.

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  13. Oh the Pee … I was told if you paint something/put something in the toilet for him/them to aim at – it might get better. We have a toddler girl who would be in there retrieving whatever it was, so that’s a bust! But I can relate to so many of these – Ask about Star Wars … could talk for hours, school?? Can’t remember is his usual answer!

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  14. Oh the Pee … I was told if you paint something/put something in the toilet for him/them to aim at – it might get better. We have a toddler girl who would be in there retrieving whatever it was, so that’s a bust! But I can relate to so many of these – Ask about Star Wars … could talk for hours, school?? Can’t remember is his usual answer!

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  15. Totally get this – especially Minecraft. What is with that !! and the Minecraft wars between thieving brothers.
    Pee – not so much on the floor but my seat -arrrrrrghhh

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  16. The pee on the floor! Though he is three so still very little. I did just buy him a new seat for the toilet with this massive willy shield on it for when he does the flick up. He was beginning to stand and pee but it just got all to hard. He also talks about Minecraft like he knows what he is on about, he doesn’t. Not that I know anything but I do know he doesn’t either.

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  17. Hell yes – my three all have and obsession with their bits as well ( they are 10 months, 2 and 7) My 8 year old daughter has her work cut out #TheList

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  18. Brilliant, my eldest turned 6 in June and he has just become obsessed by Minecraft, I don’t quite get it, and to be honest I don’t think he fully understands it lol. #thelist

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  19. Great post! I’ve got much of this to come and my boy is only 3 but farts are definitely already fun and the other day he told me what a particular dinosaur was (I forget which as I’m not a 3 year old boy) and said it exactly right. Blew my mind! Thanks for linking up to #Thelist xx

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